"F**king hell, I feel like a frog!"
Theres a broad grin across the face of Paul Gascoigne, as hes asked if he might be willing to lean forward in his chair, while he poses for a photoshoot with FourFourTwo.
Its not something wed considered beforehand, but the body shape is a little bit frog-like, now that he points it out.
His grin is followed by laughter our photoshoot started mere seconds ago, but already the banter has begun flying. Gazza, ranked no.2 in FourFourTwo's list of the best English midfielders ever, is in a very good mood and hes having fun.
Gazza: The FourFourTwo Reunion
Just hours before England book their place at the 2026 World Cup with a 5-0 win in Latvia, FFT have travelled down to Bournemouth to meet with one of the Three Lions greatest ever players arguably, the most popular of them all.
Weve been offered a rare opportunity to spend a couple of weeks getting to know Gazza, as he is now its been over a decade since we last spoke to him and weve been keen to catch up for some time.
The publication of his new book Eight offers the chance that weve been waiting for for a long time, it seemed like this moment might forever prove elusive, but here he is sat in front of us, laughing, posing for photos and taking the mickey out of us, like only Gazza could.
Never meet your heroes, people say when Gazza is in a mood as jovial as this, they couldnt be more wrong. Yesterday, hed been happy to bump into his old Rangers pal Ally McCoist on a visit to TalkSPORT as part of his book promo tour.
Earlier that day, hed also made a rare television appearance on ITVs Good Morning Britain, although only after a dental emergency. The night before, I was at home thinking about what Id say on the TV, I bit into some liquorice, and my tooth came out I thought, Oh my God! he recalls.
We had to get the dentist to open for me. Some footballers say very little while posing for photos, focused only on the camera, but Gazza is chatting with us constantly, keen to build a rapport and make us laugh, clearly enjoying himself thoroughly.
Put him in any setting, and hes a stream of consciousness, telling anecdotes at every opportunity, often jumping from one story to another so quickly were not quite sure how we got on to the subject in the first place.
Its a thoroughly entertaining chaos. All while remembering to look down the lens at the appropriate moments, one minute hes talking about a screamer he scored for Newcastle against Crystal Palace back in 1988 (I was told I wasnt shooting enough, then I scored that and said, How about that, you c**t!), and the next hes answering a call from his mother (Mam, Ill call you back, Im just doing a photoshoot), before going on to tell us a story about a Channel 4 reality TV show he did where celebrities had to live in the pitch black.
That was called Scared of the Dark, and it really was scary they turned the lights off and I walked into a f**king fence. Chris McCausland was on it too, the blind guy he was walking around like he was in here he says with a smile, looking up at the bright lights of the photo studio.
At one point, he said, Gazza, thats the wrong door. I asked, How the f**k do you know?! It took me three days to get used to all that. I was dropped from a plank, I got electrocuted I won it, though. F**k knows how!
Gazzas generous side is on show, too. No sooner had he walked through the door and shook everyone by the hand than he spotted an old England shirt and two footballs perched on a table. Wed brought them along with us in case we needed them as props for the photos.
Do you want me to sign those? he immediately offers, so used to being asked to sign things by the people he meets. It wasnt our expectation, but hes quickly signing them anyway, eager to be helpful.
The representative accompanying him has also brought a few retro shirts along Rangers, Lazio and several of the famous grey England shirts from Euro 96 for him to sign while shes seeing him, for use elsewhere.
We help Gazza lay them all out neatly, before he scribbles his autograph on each of them.
How many shirts does he think hes signed throughout the years? Oh, thousands, he says, and that may well be an underestimate. For a long time, its just been a part of his life.
So too has the south coast, where he was advised to move in an attempt to get himself back on the straight and narrow, having battled with alcohol and drug problems. Ive been here 14 years I used to live round here for my rehab, he says, explaining how the venue for our meet-up, a now-converted former cinema not too far from Bournemouths Vitality Stadium, has brought back some memories.
Since then, hes moved a few miles west to a modest rented home on a pleasant housing estate in Poole his agent Katie Davies also lives in the area. Ive only been to watch Bournemouth a couple of times, with Katie and her kids, he says.
At one point, I went to get four hot dogs, then I couldnt f**king get back in the only way was to walk to the corner flag, then all the way along in front of everyone, carrying these four f**king hot dogs
"Its nice here when the weathers good, although I always think that nobody f**king works when its raining, you dont see anybody, then when its sunny theyre all out on the beach! I dont go to the beach though, I sit in the back garden.
Thats probably understandable, as even now, at 58 years old, more than two decades after his retirement as a player, its difficult for him to be out and about without being stopped constantly, albeit nearly always by fans who want to say nice things to him.
He says one person even dropped to the ground in worship not long ago at a supermarket. Some guy walked up behind me with his two kids, got on his knees and started crying, he explains.
I thought, Get up mate, your kids will think I f**king hit you! He was crying his eyes out. I get that a lot with fans.
He first met Davies at a coffee shop, a few years after moving to the area they became good friends, before he asked her to become his agent in 2019, shocked to learn that his representative at the time, Shane Whitfield, had been charged with drug dealing.
Surprised to be asked initially, with no previous experience in the media and still in her mid-20s, she agreed to do it and has worked closely with him ever since. Gazza has even taught her fly fishing, another of his passions though forever competitive at everything he does, he jokes that she catches more fish than him a little too often for his liking.
Shes been brilliant, he says of the key role she plays in his life. She took it on and has got other footballers now, too.
It was via Davies we arranged to chat to Gazza, with a meet-up in Bournemouth always pencilled in for mid-October. Just under a fortnight beforehand however, she messages us to say that hell also be available to chat the next day during a car journey, if wed like to begin creating our feature early.
Obviously, we say yes.
Gazza still travels around the country sometimes, including for regular events such as An Evening with Paul Gascoigne, which remain hugely popular, such is his innate storytelling ability.
We decide to start our chat with the beginning of his life. When was the first moment he realised he had a special talent as a footballer?
Seven years of age, he says, without hesitation. Did he always know that hed make it to the top? Yeah, he explains.
I came from a rough background, but when I was 14, I did my autograph during a geography lesson. The teacher asked what I was doing and I told him, Im signing my autograph, I want to be a professional footballer.
He said, Theres only one in a million who make it. I said, Im going to f**king make it and got kicked out of the class.
After the 1990 World Cup, I went back to the school and said, Do you remember me, you f**king bastard!
Throughout his progression into adulthood, there was never any doubt where he was at his happiest. When I put the boots on, he says.
It didnt matter when it was I enjoyed playing whether it was in front of 5,000 or f**king 95,000. I liked making people happy.
As the stages he played on got bigger and bigger, he never felt the pressure that should have come along with it. No, I dont know why, he admits. Im a genius, probably and a pain in the arse! I just knew I was good.
"I used to tell opposition players, Good luck, Ill be your worst f**king nightmare today. That said, there were still a couple of midfield combatants he had particular respect for.
Bryan Robson was f**king frightening, I used to call him Dogs**t because when I played against him, he was everywhere, Gazza chuckles its possibly the only time that particular word has been used as a compliment.
As a young Newcastle player, he also didnt get an easy ride from Vinnie Jones the Wimbledon hard man was once famously photographed with a handful of Gazzas testicles during a fixture at Plough Lane, in an attempt to put him off his game.
Jones would nevertheless become a friend. In his new book, Gazza explains that at the end of that game, he sent a single red rose into the home dressing room, having been given it by a member of the crowd.
Vinnie gave me a toilet brush in return! he laughs now, as he talks to FFT. Hes a good lad. Me and Vinnie get on well.
When I was 17 at Newcastle, I got hold of the groundsmans tractor and was driving it towards the training ground, but didnt know how to put the brakes on I drove through the training ground wall it went through the f**king building. I only got fined �25 for that one thats all I was on in wages at the time!
Gazza on tractors
When I was 17 at Newcastle, I got hold of the groundsmans tractor and was driving it towards the training ground, but didnt know how to put the brakes on I drove through the training ground wall it went through the f**king building. I only got fined �25 for that one thats all I was on in wages at the time!
Gazza left Newcastle for Tottenham in 1988 reneging on an agreement to join Manchester United, something that Alex Ferguson remains irked about. He said, Im going on holiday and when I come back, are you signing for United? Gazza remembers.
I said yes. But Irving Scholar [chairman] at Spurs offered my family �120,000 for a house, so I went there, then I got a letter from Ferguson saying, You stupid c**t.
Well, he called me stupid bastard. After that, I beat United and scored against them.
What was Fergusons reaction to that? Not very nice! he laughs. The last time I saw him was with Katie in the players' lounge at Manchester United, about three years ago.
He said to me, Office! he called me into his office to give me a bollocking! I was over f**king 50 years of age, by the way He said, You should have signed for me, and I replied, Im sorry. Hes the only manager, even now, that I s**t myself when I see him!
Moving away from his Newcastle home presented challenges back then, just as it did when he moved to Bournemouth. Are there times, even today, when he misses the North East?
Have you ever met the f**king Gascoignes?! he quips.
It was at Italia 90 where Gazza went stratospheric, performing superbly to take the Three Lions to a first semi-final since 1966, becoming a national hero in the process, a status hes retained ever since.
It seems surprising, then, that in his book, he explains that before the tournament, he feared he might not play at all. Thats why I got No.19 for that World Cup I was the 19th player, he says now.
Before the tournament, wed played Tunisia away, I tried to play a passback and they scored. I thought, Im not going to play now.
Bobby Robson put his arm around Gazza though and made it clear he still had faith. Englands opening game of Italia 90 was only his sixth start for his country, but he was in no danger of relinquishing his spot from there.
Why did tournament football always get the best out of him? Because we didnt invite the wives! he laughs. At some World Cups, the wives have had more publicity than the players, and thats not right.
"The players should just solely concentrate for one month or five weeks on the World Cup, thats it. Bobby Robson wouldnt even let us watch the TV, no newspapers, nothing.
"We were lucky to make a phone call back home to find out what was going on. We were only concentrating on the football.
Did that lack of distractions help? Yeah, because the players bonded, he says. I remember all of us together around the pool, relaxing. It was my birthday during the World Cup and I got a cake whacked in my face! The squad was f**king unbelievable, from Peter Shilton all the way up to Gary Lineker.
The blip against Tunisia forgotten about, he was quickly more confident than ever even offering a preview of his future talent as an after-dinner speaker, despite only being 23 at the time. A trial hed had at Robsons Ipswich as a youngster, when he ultimately wasnt offered a deal, got a mention.
We had a dinner one night, it was packed full with Bobby Robsons friends and people from the FA I dont know why but I decided to stand up and do a speech, just about myself, he laughs. It was funny.
I said, I first met Bobby Robson when I was 12, and he offered us 10 grand a week, but I wouldnt take a job for no one! An anxious flyer, he was sometimes invited into the cockpit during flights to calm his nerves.
In his book, he explains that on the journey to the quarter-final with Cameroon in Naples, he was briefly allowed to take over the controls, which inevitably led to him turning the England teams plane off course. I took over the aeroplane and told the pilot where to f**king go it went about three miles to the right! he laughs now.
By the time the semi-final clash with West Germany in Turin arrived, Gazzas displays were being widely lauded. The best bit about the entire tournament was that I knew I was the best player in the world, he looks back.
In the tunnel before the semi-final, someone from Juventus said they wanted to sign me after the World Cup so I had that going through my head as I was walking out onto the pitch.
Gazza on fire extinguishers
I was in a restaurant and about to go home, and a guy said, Liam Gallaghers over there. Id never met him I said, F**k me and stopped the taxi. I went up to him he was sitting on his own, having a steak. He said, F**king hell, sit down mate, how are you doing? Do you want something to eat? I said, No, Im not hungry, Ill have a drink though. He said, OK, Ill go and get you one, so he went for the drink and I ate his f**king steak. He went f**king off at me, going, Wheres my f**king steak, man? [Gazza attempts a Mancunian accent that somehow makes Liam sound American] I went, Ive ate the c**t. He said, You c**t Ill go and get another. But he didnt, he came back around the corner with a fire extinguisher, set it off and absolutely slaughtered us with it!
What could have been the greatest night of his career turned into one of the saddest, with the yellow card that ensured hed miss the final if England got there, and the tears that followed.
He says his emotions were brought on by the realisation that, whatever the result of that semi-final, the greatest few weeks of his career would come to an end in just a few minutes time. I thought it was the end of my life, I thought that was my career over with, he explains of the emotions.
The booking also ended any prospect of a box-office duel between Gazza and Diego Maradona in the World Cup final. Yeah, that would have been good, he admits.
I knew that I had the better of Lothar Matthaus for Germany, but playing against Maradona, f**king hell I did it a few times in Soccer Aid and in Seville, and he was still unbelievable. We could have done f**king rehab together!
"Ive had a couple of drinks with him. The fixture against Maradonas Sevilla side was a charity game during Gazzas days playing for Lazio in Serie A. Lazio dropped me from playing on the Sunday because they wanted me to play against Maradona on the Tuesday, and I wasnt happy about that, so I f**ked off to Euro Disney, he explains, of his impromptu trip to the Paris theme park.
They found out where I was, and I was drunk, but I told them, Ill meet the players in Seville and Ill play against Maradona, OK. I got on the plane and got pissed. In the tunnel, I said, Diego, Im pissed. He said, Its OK, Gazza, so am I I just started laughing!
I scored in that game I beat about five players, an unbelievable goal. If I didnt know what the f**k I was doing, the defence had no chance.
I looked at Maradona and said, F**king beat that then, will you? And he f**king did! What a goal I went, Oh, f**k me!
Afterwards I went back to Lazio and they said, Were fining you �40,000, so I f**ked off back to Euro Disney again. After that they said, OK, well call it quits, just get back here.
His move to Lazio had been due to happen in 1991, but was delayed by a year when he damaged his ACL with a wild challenge on Nottingham Forests Gary Charles in the FA Cup final.
Two days later I was supposed to be signing for Lazio for f**king �2 million he says, referencing his signing-on fee for the deal the transfer fee was �5.5m.
I asked the doctor how long Id be out, if it would be a month, and he said no. I said, Three months? He said it was nine and I went, Oh f**k. I just had to knuckle down, but it was hard, on your own in the gym, looking out the window and seeing the lads training.
Then when I was ready to play again, I f**king went out clubbing, got punched and broke my kneecap in half, so I had another eight months out. I got fit from all that and eventually made the move to Lazio, then f**king three months in, in training I kicked Alessandro Nesta by the back of the calf, and did my fibula and tibia.
Another year-and-a-bit out. I missed maybe four years of international football, but I still managed to get fit again and back to my best.
Gazza had a special present for his new team-mates on his Lazio arrival giving each a Teach Yourself English book as a joke. Yeah, that was because I couldnt be bothered speaking Italian; you speak English! he laughs.
But I spoke Italian quite quickly, to be fair. The first words I learned were, Show me the money
Everyone wanted to talk to him in Rome. I got a phone call once, and our manager Dino Zoff said, I think youd better take it, Gazza says. I went, Im f**king training, tell them to call back, who the f**k is it?
"And it was the Pope. I answered the phone and said, Hi Pope, you all right? My dad was a Catholic, so we went to the Vatican to meet the Pope we shook hands with him. Gazza also tells a story about the novel way he eased the tension before a derby clash with Roma.
We were all s**tting ourselves about the match, so I went to a pet shop, bought a little mouse and put it in the top pocket of my Lazio jacket, he says. Dino Zoff was doing a team talk, and this f**king mouse kept on coming out onto my shoulder.
I was like, F**k off and kept on putting it back down again. Then the president came in and went, Right guys, I want to give you five grand if you win today. I said, Make it 10 grand, because I have to pay the mouse five grand.
I scored that game, then afterwards I found the mouse in the dressing room, said Cheers and pushed it back in my pocket.
Gazza was renowned for pulling pranks during his career. Why did he love them so much? Id get bored, he says matter-of-factly.
Which one was his favourite? I caught this snake, put it in a plastic bag and put it in Roberto Di Matteos pocket after training. Then I asked if he could lend me some money, so hed put his hand in his pocket
At Rangers, Coisty didnt turn up for a drink, so I got a rabbit, two budgies and two goldfish, and left them outside his house, when his kids had just finished school. He rang us up saying, You c**t! What the f**k have you got my family?
"He had to keep them they said, Thanks for the animals, dad, we love them!
Among the many he did throughout his career, is there a prank that stands out for not going entirely as planned? I had to buy a new car for Gordon Durie, he says, wincing at how much it set him back.
Id put two trout in his car after training, and the smell was so bad that the chairman made me buy him a new car. Seventeen grand that cost me! It was still cheaper than the other f**king trout I f**king divorced
Gazza on ostriches
At Spurs, the lads said I wasnt funny, so I went, Ill show you. I went past this f**king zoo and thought, Oh, thats a good idea. The next morning I went in and asked to borrow an ostrich. I waited until the lads were warming up and sent it on the pitch, it was f**king funny. The funniest thing was we finished training at 12.30pm, then I tried to catch the ostrich f**k, it took me about three hours, I was f**ked! But we got it and took it back. There were feathers all over the place!
Gazza joined Rangers from Lazio in 1995. I loved it at Lazio, but they got a new manager and it was time to move on, he says. When I went to Rangers, the fans were f**king unbelievable.
"They were like Newcastle fans, they worked all week just to get a ticket for the match they werent interested in anything else, just football. I f**king loved it there. He was a Rangers player when he hit his iconic Euro 96 goal against Scotland, flicking the ball over Colin Hendrys head and volleying home, followed up with his dentists chair celebration.
For the pure significance, he admits its still his favourite goal. Because I was playing for my country, he says. I was playing against my own players from Rangers, theyd been giving me grief before the tournament and I said, Just wait until we get to Wembley, tell me then
Naturally, he made the most of the moment when he got back to Glasgow for the start of pre-season. Oh yeah, I hammered them! he laughs. I got the photograph of the goal and put it all around the dressing room.
A few years ago, he unexpectedly bumped into Hendry again. I met him in London, Gazza says. He said, What are you doing in London? And I asked him, What are you doing in London? I thought I left you at f**king Wembley!
Like at Italia 90, the semi-final against Germany is a more painful memory. At the Euros, he came so close to scoring the golden goal, inches from tapping in Alan Shearers cross-shot at the far post.
If it was Shearer or Lineker, they would have scored that, he admits. But I thought the keeper was going to get a touch, so I paused for a second.
Like his dentists chair moment, a special celebration had been planned, too it would have been the first ever golden goal at a major tournament. We were going to run round the pitch and down the tunnel, he says.
Brilliant at both Italia 90 and Euro 96, its forever remained a frustration that Gazza only played at two international tournaments. The knee injury suffered in the 1991 FA Cup Final ruled him out of Euro 92, England failed to qualify for USA 94, then he infamously didnt make the cut when Glenn Hoddle announced his squad for France 98.
Widely expected to be picked, hed been in the tabloid headlines shortly beforehand, photographed on a night out with pal Chris Evans in London.
At the end of the Three Lions subsequent training camp in La Manga, he sensed he was about to be told he hadnt made the final squad angrily storming in to confront Hoddle and trashing the room.
It took me a year to get over it, he admits. I was going through a divorce, my head wasnt right and Glenn Hoddle is a prick.
He said it was because of my drinking, but the night when I had the drink with Chris Evans, six other players were at a nightclub until 6am. Terry Venables had warned me, Be careful, Hoddles going to try to make a name for himself. He probably did.
How did he sense hed been dropped before Hoddle even delivered the news? We had to line up like kids outside the room, so I knew, he recalls.
Hoddles a prick anyway hes a f**king dick. Weve clearly touched a nerve thats still raw even now, 27 years on, and hes becoming angry talking about Hoddle, so we feel its better to move to something more positive.
So, which manager did he most enjoy playing for? Terry Venables, Gazza says, having worked with El Tel for both Spurs and England.
Which was his happiest moment under him? Every day, he adds. When he died, I was sat in the car with Katie and cried my eyes out. Terry was a f**king diamond. He had to be, to put up with me.
Venables knew how to lift Gazza today, whenever the former midfielder meets fans at speaking events, they do, too. They give me a little boost, he says. Photo requests can be unusual, though one even involved a glass eye.
A guy went, If I give you something, can I have a selfie with it? Gazza says. He pulled his f**king eye out and said Can you hold that?
Odd things dont just happen when hes at events, either. The other day I went to the bank for something, and the guy asked for my f**king identity, then asked for a f**king selfie! he says.
He spends a lot of time watching TV at home, but admits he doesnt watch too many matches. I miss football, so I dont watch it, he says.
I dont like the commentary as well, they talk too much, especially Ally McCoist, he talks f**king too much Steve McManaman and Coisty, f**k me, they could talk a f**king glass eye to sleep I should have given them that f**king eye I had that picture taken with!
Hes said previously that going out and about for events can sometimes pose a potential issue of fans offering to buy him a drink not ideal, given his history with alcohol. If I want a drink, I buy it myself. I dont go out to pubs, I drink indoors, he insists. Is he doing OK at the moment, in his battle against it?
I was he initially responds, somewhat cryptically. Yeah, of course I am. I went to an AA meeting last night. If I want a f**king drink, then Ill drink if I dont want a drink, I wont drink.
We sense hes getting a little defensive on this hes had a tiring day travelling and weve already had a long and very enjoyable chat, so its maybe not the right moment to ask about the more serious subjects. Well return to those when we meet up in Bournemouth.
Before then, we ask him to pick one current England player who reminds him of himself the most, and well talk more about them next time. Jack Grealish, he says with an audible smile.
Weve arranged to meet Gazza at 11am in Bournemouth for our photoshoot footballers are often late, but bang on time, he arrives and greets everyone with a smile, after a quick cigarette outside. The studio where we meet is on a reasonably busy road, so the past 60 seconds must have prompted at least five passing motorists to double take and ask themselves, Is that Gazza?!
Hes full of energy, proving superb company as he reels off anecdote after anecdote during the photos. Someone asked me recently if I fancied a game of walking football, and I said, F**k off, Im not that old! he laughs.
Photoshoot over, we sit down for the resumption of our chat. Why did he choose Grealish when we spoke last time? Because it doesnt matter if he loses the ball, he always wants it again, he explains.
Hes handsome as well! It amazes me when managers put him sub, because hes always dangerous. Grealish was born in 1995, but has often said that Gazza is his hero.
After joining Everton on loan this summer, the winger chose the No.18 shirt, partly because Gazza wore it during his own time with the Toffees. Yeah I saw that, I think Wayne Rooney had that number as well, Gazza says.
I heard one of the commentators say it and thought, Oh, thats nice of him. Evertons a good club, I enjoyed it when I was there. Would he like to see Grealish back in the England squad for the World Cup? Definitely, and I think hell make it, he says. I cant see him not going, because hes always going to be a threat.
Like Gazza, Grealish has delivered at major tournaments before, most notably at Euro 2020. Its funny, because I met him in the corridor after an England game and said, Are you going home to rest now?
Gazza remembers, having bumped into Grealish following a match against North Macedonia in June 2023. He said, No, Im going to Las Vegas on the drink, and I started laughing. I said, Youve got potential, mate!
And he just laughed. I like it when players have a little laugh and a joke, but still perform. Gazza has already told us he doesnt watch much football now, but will he tune in to the tournament next summer? Ill probably watch the World Cup, but not every game, he says.
England came so close to silverware under his former team-mate Gareth Southgate. Can they win this World Cup? Weve been saying that since 1966 we got close when Chris Waddle hit the post in extra-time in 1990, he says.
But youve got France, Portugal, Germany, Brazil and Argentina. Its going to be a hard task for England to win the World Cup we have a chance like everyone else, but every player has got to be on it, you cant afford to carry anybody.
"It was a shame for Gareth, hes a great guy. Which current manager does Gazza think hed most enjoy playing for? Pep Guardiola, he says. Ive seen interviews and a documentary he was in; he seems like a nice guy. The way he talks with his players, hes either angry with him or so nice to them. A bit like Terry Venables.
Like Venables, who released a single that reached the UK top 40, Gazza was once an unlikely music sensation, adding vocals to a new rendition of Lindisfarne track Fog on the Tyne, helping it climb to as high as number two in the singles charts shortly after Italia 90.
How did he rate his singing? F**king terrible it did all right though, to be fair! he laughs. I enjoyed it Fog on the Tyne, f**k me!
The opportunity came as a by-product of his fame hes been in the public eye for nearly 40 years now. It has its good points, he says. I get some nice perks for free.
"Once, I said I liked dickie bows, then all of a sudden outside my door were a f**king load of dickie bows. I thought, F**king hell, OK So I mentioned I liked guitars, and the next thing I knew there were three or four at the front door!
Such fame is far from straightforward, though. Its dealing with everything, he says. Sometimes its difficult, and sometimes I snap. Its great to become famous, but in England, once youre a celebrity, thats it, they try to knock you down. Ive had to deal with constant lies being written about me.
The attention he gets when he goes out and about also means hell often retreat back home, preferring the peace and quiet of his own company. I get pestered every two minutes when I go outside in public, he admits.
I spend a lot of time on my own, maybe too much, just in the house. Its a shame because the trout lake is about 45 minutes away, and by the time I pay �95 for that I always go for four trout I catch them within 10 f**king minutes, theyre like, Wow, then I get the taxi home again. But I enjoy fly fishing it takes my mind away from everything else.
Former team-mates do check in with him to see how he is. Its nice of them to do that, theyre always there for me, he says. I hate answering the phone nowadays because its f**king non-stop, but Ill say, Hi, Im all right. Its normally texts Alan Shearer will text me, Gary Lineker, Peter Beardsley.
Hes still friends with Vinnie Jones, too. Ive texted him a few times, and been to see him at his place, he says. Weve been fishing a couple of times, although his rods were dodgy as f**k he must have paid �5 for them, not like mine!
At Middlesbrough, I drove the team bus out of the garage, but that lasted about 100 yards. Bryan Robson was like, Gazza, wheres the bus? I said. Its in the f**king trees, gaffer, its f**ked. He said, Gazza, thats a �400,000 bus
I ended up driving a London bus once, too I drove it down the road, singing, Were all going on a summer holiday. Id told my dad Id go to London and behave myself I got to my hotel room and thought, Thank God my dad didnt see that.
But then I turned Sky News on and they said, Apparently, 20 minutes ago, Paul Gascoigne was seen That was it, my phone went and it was my dad going, F**king hell, you stupid bastard, youre never going to learn, are you? I said, No, I dont think so!
As for the person he still regards as his best friend from football, he doesnt take long to answer. Chris Waddle, Ive always been close with him, he says of his fellow Geordie.
I roomed with him at Spurs and with England. Ive always had a laugh with him, especially during the World Cup in 1990.
I always used to wind everyone up, because me and him were up early, and we used to blast the f**king radio. People would shout at us, Get that f**king radio off!
Me and Chris were mad. We were all given a bar of chocolate every night, so I used to steal them from other peoples rooms. I went into the wrong room one night, it was dark, opened the fridge and got the chocolate.
It was the worst two players I could have picked, f**king Chris Woods and Terry Butcher. I ran along the corridor, but Chris whacked me on the back of the head. I went flying, then said, Theres your chocolate back
Even when were talking about a more serious subject, the mere mention of a particular name is enough to trigger a funny anecdote, like a comedian who uses little jumping-off points to launch into segments of their stand-up routine.
Very few could play football as well as Gazza, and very few can tell funny stories like him either. Could he have been a stand-up comedian if he hadnt been a footballer? Aye, probably, or in jail, one of the f**king two! he quips.
Another friend was boxing legend Ricky Hatton a similarly larger-than-life character adored by the public. I did a venue with Ricky, Phil Taylor and Jimmy White in Bristol, Gazza begins.
Ricky was funny as f**k. We had a few drinks, then in the morning I woke him out of bed and asked him, What are you doing today? He said, Im having a shower, then Im going to do Celebrity Bullseye.
He went into the shower, I was sat in his room and his shoes were there, they were black. Ive seen a gold marker and f**king signed Paul Gascoigne on one.
He went, You f**king idiot! I watched him on the show, he was throwing darts with only one shoe on, f**king brilliant!
The boxers passing, aged 46, shocked the country, even if his mental health struggles were no secret. The opening of the inquest into his death tragically indicated the cause as hanging.
I did a couple of venues with him what a shame, a great guy, a great character, Gazza says. He was like myself, he gave his time up for anybody, and hed give his last penny away. It was heartbreaking.
Did hearing the news make Gazza determined to enjoy his own life even more? Yeah, Im enjoying my own life, he stresses, reassuring us, and sounding very much like he means it.
If anything bad happened to me, it would be my fault, it wouldnt be anybody elses. We ask sensitively whether theres ever been a point when he thought he might not still be here himself.
No, Ive never been that bad, he says. I have been down and that, Ive been psychotic, but Ive never wanted to kill myself.
In his book though, he admits that with hindsight he risked his life in 2010 when he travelled to Rothbury, an old Northumberland fishing haunt, in an attempt to talk to Raoul Moat during a police siege.
Moat had murdered his ex-girlfriends partner, was armed and in a stand-off with police that dominated rolling news when Gazza unexpectedly turned up, wanting to give him a fishing rod, some chicken and a can of lager. A copper stopped me, he tells FFT. I was cocained up. The next morning, I looked at my phone, I had 300 f**king missed calls and thought, What the f**k have I done? I put Sky News on and just thought, Oh f**k.
My dad sectioned me after that. I was 11 days in a nuthouse, then I was OK. I got a f**king bollocking. He soon moved to Bournemouth to spend time at the Providence Project rehab facility, and has remained down south ever since.
His new book is titled Eight not just because its the number he wore for much of his career, but also because he addresses the emotions hes experienced during his life. Its about my eight demons, everything Ive had to face up to, he explains of the book. Ive conquered most of them. The rest are hard to conquer, but I just try to deal with them the best I can.
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and alcoholism remain challenges. Im always going to be an alcoholic, he admits.
Its not like tomorrow I can drink normally once you have the first one, youre f**ked. Ive had my ups and downs in the last couple of years. Ive had four months off it, then a two-day bender.
It used to be weeks of benders, but its only about two days now, and Ill stop Ill think, Waste of f**king time. I only drink indoors anyway; its not as if I go out and drink, partying. I cant remember the last time I went out to a nightclub or a pub.
In July, reports surfaced that Gazza had been taken into intensive care hes since explained that he suffers from a hernia condition, and that an alcohol relapse led to a friend finding him semi-conscious in his bathroom, though he insists the situation wasnt as grave as the newspapers made out.
He tells FFT that he had another brief rocky period with alcohol 10 or so days ago, which might explain why he was more defensive on the subject when we spoke to him before. Today hes clearly fine, and has been far more willing to talk about more serious subjects.
Gazza has achieved so much during his life, and we ask if theres one thing hes most proud of. Just playing for England, he says. I always wanted to represent my country. And at every club I went to, I never let them down. I always performed to my best, and I won loads of individual medals.
Hes never forgotten his working-class roots, either. My dad told me, Always remember where you come from and never change, he explains. All my life, Ive never turned down a request for an autograph or a photo.
When he thinks back to the young Gazza with a dream, practising his own autograph in the classroom, could he ever have imagined quite the greatness it would lead to? Not really, he admits. I just knew I wanted to be a footballer when I was seven, and I achieved all the goals I wanted to achieve I dont think theres anything I didnt achieve. I just miss it still, thats all.
Its time to wrap up our chat we do so by thanking him for all of his time, and telling him that hes always been a hero of ours. Cheers mate, God bless you, he smiles. No matter how many thousands of people tell him the same thing, its obvious that the adulation still means something to him.
Hes been happily chatting away for so long the representative accompanying him today needs to head off in another direction. Shes brought some cartons of orange juice and groceries to take home with him, and asks if Gazza would like a taxi ordered.
FFT offers to give him a lift home and he gladly accepts. Soon were dropping him off at his front door he thanks us for the ride and says hes enjoyed spending time with us.
We didnt quite know which Gazza we were going to get when we embarked upon this interview over our fortnight with him though, we feel like we got to know many different sides of him.
At times his unconventional nature meant it felt a bit like we were in an episode of Louis Therouxs Weird Weekends, but it was a heart-warming experience, an encounter with a great of the game and an English football idol that well forever be able to remember fondly.
In the end, what we got was a happy Gazza. And if hes happy, were happy.
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